Creating in the Quiet: A Personal Check-In

Greetings, friends!

This life update is a bit overdue, but I’ve been buried in work—preparing new designs, tutorials, and class pieces. And truth be told, I’ve also been feeling a bit discouraged. This post is going to be a little longer than usual, so thank you for sticking with me. You know I like to keep it real here on the blog, and today I’m sharing a more personal side of my creative journey.

As many of you know, Blue Ribbon Designs has been my full-time job for over 20 years. When you’re an artist working from home, positive feedback and encouragement become especially meaningful. In today’s fast-paced world, kindness and uplifting words seem harder to come by—and with everyone so busy, it’s rare to hear a simple “thank you” or note of appreciation.

My regular readers and friends know I pour countless hours into designing and creating projects, writing detailed tutorials, and collaborating with companies I admire—often with minimal, if any, compensation. More often than not, I don’t even receive confirmation that my work was received, let alone a message of gratitude or excitement. It’s deflating, and at times, it makes me question my place in this industry.

I’m proud of the work I create. I know it’s thoughtful, high-quality, and made with care—but hearing that from someone else can be such a day brightener. A kind word goes a long way. It’s not about praise—it’s about feeling seen and valued. And in all honesty, I haven’t felt valued or appreciated lately, which has led me to question where I belong and what direction I should take with my career.

Working with companies I admire for little or no pay—and very little appreciation—is no longer sustainable. As a lifelong pleaser, words of validation mean the most to me, and they’ve been missing for quite some time. Blue Ribbon Designs has always been a passion project—and I can live meagerly if I’m doing what I love and feel valued. But lately, I’ve felt disconnected and disheartened.

But here’s the thing—I still believe in the power of creativity. I still believe in the joy of making something with your hands, the comfort of stitching, and the beauty of sharing that joy with others. Even in the quiet moments, when doubt creeps in, I remind myself why I started Blue Ribbon Designs in the first place: to inspire, to connect, and to create with heart.

So while I’ve been keeping to myself lately, I’ve also been pouring that energy into new designs, fresh ideas, and meaningful projects that I hope will bring joy to others. I’m taking time to reflect on what truly fuels me creatively and how I can continue to share that passion in a way that feels authentic and fulfilling.

If you’ve ever stitched one of my designs, sewn one of my patterns, read a tutorial, watched a video, or simply shared a kind word or liked a post—please know it means more than you could ever imagine. Your support, even in the smallest form, helps keep the creative spark alive.

I’m not giving up—I’m just recalibrating. I’m finding my way back to the joy of creating for the sake of creating. And I’m hopeful that the next chapter will be filled with more connection, more appreciation, and more inspired work.

Thank you for being here. Thank you for reading. And thank you for supporting independent artists and makers.

In other news of note…

We’re making a big shift—starting this week, we’re officially going back to a daytime schedule! Yes, you read that right—after nearly three years of working nights, we’re finally returning to a more traditional routine. It’s a big adjustment, but one I’m welcoming with open arms (and a lot of caffeine).

And that’s not the only exciting thing happening…

I’m also getting ready for another big international adventure with my parents! This time, we’re headed to Rome for a few days, followed by a Mediterranean cruise from Rome to Barcelona, and then we’ll spend a few more days exploring beautiful Barcelona. My second dad started planning this trip just a couple of months ago, and we leave on November 1st—so I’ve been scrambling to meet deadlines and wrap up projects before we go.

It’s going to be a whirlwind few weeks, but I’m so grateful for the opportunity to travel with my parents and assist them, while soaking up other cultures and inspiration along the way. You know I will take a lot of photos and videos to share upon my return.

Finally today…

Travis and I visited GloWild at the Kansas City Zoo last weekend, and—as you can probably guess—I took quite a few photos! 

We went last December for the holiday lights and knew we wanted to return this year. Now in its fourth year, GloWild runs from September through early January, starting as a fall exhibit and transitioning into a holiday-themed experience at the end of October.

Knowing we’d want to visit more than once, we purchased passes so we can go as often as we like this season. This unique and immersive nighttime experience invites guests to explore massive, handcrafted artworks displayed throughout the Zoo. This year’s theme takes visitors on a journey through time—from nineteenth-century Paris to the American centennial, and even a sci-fi-inspired trip to the future!

The mile-long path is filled with intricate lighted sculptures, crafted by more than 150 artisans using over 34 tons of steel and 89,000 feet of fabric. It’s a one-way trail packed with photo ops, concessions, and entertainment—and it’s truly a spectacle to behold.

I wanted to share a selection of photos from our visit, because this exhibit is super impressive and absolutely worth experiencing if you're in the area!

Continue reading after images...

As I navigate this season of change—both personally and professionally—I’m reminded of the importance of staying true to my creative voice and finding joy in the little things, whether it’s a quiet moment at my sewing machine, a stroll through glowing art installations, or planning a meaningful trip with loved ones. Thank you for being part of this journey and for supporting Blue Ribbon Designs. Your encouragement, kindness, and presence mean more than you know. I’m looking forward to sharing more inspiration, stories, and creativity with you in the days ahead.

Rollercoaster of a Journey

Greeting friends! It's been a while since my last post...and I have so much to share (which I will do over several updates). Time has been a hot commodity lately and it has been a challenge to find balance. I do my best to keep this a positive and creative space...but lately I have been struggling and focusing the majority of my time on work...and (to be completely honest), I just can't seem to get ahead. Each time I reach a goal or a proud moment, harsh reality seems to be right there to bring me back down a notch (or two, or three!). I am really looking at the future of Blue Ribbon Designs and what positive changes I have to make in order to continue to work in the needlework and quilting communities...because in this current economic climate, being a small business owner is not for the faint of heart. I know many of you are struggling as well - and just know, you are not alone.

While I haven't posted in quite some time, I have been doing all sorts of creative endeavors behind the scenes. After building a brand new website, I managed to convert all of my classic paper patterns to digital PDF designs and all my new digital designs are now available in paper format, as well. That means ALL Blue Ribbon Designs are available in either format - for those who like a traditional printed paper pattern, I have you covered....and for those who like the digital format and working from a device - or if you are overseas (or the US) and prefer not to pay the extremely high cost of shipping - or if you like the instant gratification of having a pattern in your hands immediately, I can take care of you too! I know that there are supporters of both formats and I wanted to make everyone happy (yes, we all know by now that I am a pleaser). I hope you will stop by my updated Etsy Shop and take a look - designs are separated into sections for PAPER or DIGITGAL...and all digital designs have a round blue badge on the cover...

Funny story - when converting all my classic designs to digital format, I found I only had my earliest designs on 3.5" floppy disk - REALLY!! - I have been designing that long! I had to order an external USB floppy disk drive from Amazon to load all my early design files onto my current computer....

I have also been adding new project bags to my Etsy Shop as often as possible...this includes more of my signature bags made from vintage Blackbird Designs fabrics. I have been adding both my classic bags and some patchwork bags, as well. While working on listings this past week, I did a little research and found that I sold my first project bag in 2010 - over 12 years ago...which doesn't even seem possible. I really wish I would have kept count over the years, as it would be interesting to have an accurate number of project bags I have created...but going through the folders of images I have, I am sure I am in the thousands. More interesting - when I started making them, I didn't know anyone else that made project bags for purchase...now there are so many makers and shops popping up, it is hard to believe I still have clients and customers. If you happen to be carrying around or using one (or more) of my signature project bags, THANK YOU...project bags are just one part of my small business, but they have allowed me to continue to work in this creative industry and I am so grateful for your patronage - especially with all the new competition...your project bag orders and purchases have been a blessing! Here are a few that I have listed this week - some of which are still available at the time of this post...

If you follow my social media, then you know I have also been continually working on needlework finishing and custom sewing/quilting/project bags - I actually have quite a bit of travel scheduled over then new few months and was hoping to get all my client orders finished beforehand...but as projects have continued to arrive, I don't think that will be an option. I have completed quite a few orders and will be posting some creative photos over the next several days.

On the design front (my very favorite branch of Blue Ribbon Designs), I have three new quilt patterns I am currently working on and four new counted cross stitch designs. These will all be coming in the next several months - hopefully before I travel out of the country for a few weeks later this year.

Add all of that to basic life and real world obligations and I guess that is a BIG part of the reason I am having a bit of a hard time finding a balance. Real talk - when I struggle to make financial ends meet, I take on more creative jobs (which let's be completely real, are not big money makers), then I struggle to keep up with all those jobs and find it hard to make time to do the actual designing that brings me joy...and it is a vicious circle...at some point, something is going to have to change, because right now, I am feeling quite defeated. Someone recently shared the following with me on social media and it pretty much sums it up:

The unfortunate truth of owning and running a business.

Running a business is really hard.

What they don’t tell you is that it can cause severe stress and anxiety, and drains you mentally to the point of depression in even the most laid-back people.

People will talk about you, compare you to others, use you, they will view you as a service and not a person anymore.

Friends will expect discounts and people will value you and your hard work less than a big chain store.

You have to worry about if you forget to email/message someone back, are they going to think it was on purpose? Did you disappoint them? Will they hold that against you? When in reality you just can’t get to everyone’s messages and emails.

Starting up and running a successful business puts incredible strain on personal lives and relationships, many of which fail because there is just often no work-life balance. You need to be the director, the worker, the admin, the marketing team, the accountant, the shipping department, and the cleaner; all while being a parent, a caregiver, a husband or a wife, family support, friend... it’s one of the hardest things you will try and balance.

There’s a reason you don’t see many people succeed in small businesses after a few years. If they are successful they are overwhelmed. It takes a toll. It’s freaking exhausting. Especially the past couple of years when so much has been out of our control.

Here’s a small reminder that we are just normal people with hectic lives. Be kind, be patient, support small businesses…and hopefully more of us will stick around!

All of that is the long way of saying why I haven't been sharing/visiting here much lately...I'm still around - I'm still working hard - I'm still doing creative projects every single day - I'm still trying to be focused and positive - I still believe in Blue Ribbon Designs. What the future holds for my small business in this day and age is hard to know, but I thank you all for being on this rollercoaster of a journey with me! 

Real Talk & A Long Overdue Update

Greeting friends! I know it has been a while since my last post...and real talk - it is because I have been struggling...and when I am struggling, I close off into my own little work bubble and focus on tasks. I truly believe that happiness is something we create and when I am blue (or in this case heartbroken), rather than mope and/or cry, I work...I dive deep into studio projects, cleaning, yardwork...anything to keep me busy enough not to be sad. I hibernate - I stay away from people and focus on anything that will give me a sense of accomplishment. A couple months ago, Kansas was starting to feel like home and my creativity was blooming...but these last several weeks have truly been a test, both personally and professionally.

I removed my last blog post in mid-May, a couple days after I shared it...it was my Full Heart Farm Quilt for the Poppie Cotton Fabric Tour...and to be honest, I just left it sitting in my drafts trying to decide what to do with it. I have always been very honest with my readers and do my best to keep it real here. If you have visited my blog before, then you know that creativity is in the foundation of who I am - I have been designing cross stitch and quilt patterns for nearly 20-years and have been in the industry for almost 23-years. Like most artists and designers, I have my own style and it is recognizable. 

Before I share a bit more on this subject - a few details: I have been working with Poppie Cotton (a fabric company) for quite some time, creating for their Fabric Tours - they send me a fat quarter stack of a new fabric collection (at no charge) months before release and I design and play with it. I take photos of my projects to help showcase their fabrics - I do this for personal satisfaction and enjoyment and they do not pay me. I just love their fabric collections and working with them brings me joy. I send them the images of my projects and I post here and on all my social media accounts to raise awareness and excitement for their new fabric lines. If I make any money from these projects, it is because of consumer interest in my design(s) and I write a pattern for purchase, listing Poppie Cotton as a fabric source. When I am working on my projects, I have no idea what other creators are making, like I said I am usually working on my ideas months before the fabric is even released. 

My Full Heart Farm Wall Hanging (shown in my last post, which I am reactivating, but removing links and details about a pattern) was created in my normal fashion - I sat down with a fat quarter stack from the Poppie Cotton Farm Girls Unite fabric collection, uploaded fabric swatch images into EQ8 Quilt Design Software and designed my sampler quilt....doing what I always do - creating from the theme of the fabric and design motifs.

I was extremely proud of this quilt - I spent days upon days designing and creating my wall hanging (as my regular readers know, I am a pleaser and perfectionist and put my whole heart into each project - I wanted it to be something Poppie Cotton would be proud to share). Since any work I do is a reflection on my Blue Ribbon Designs brand, I give 110%, no matter what.

Several days after I made my original post, I received a message from Lori at Poppie Cotton saying my quilt had "definite similarities" to a quilt they designed for the same collection. It went on to say "we know how hard it is to be unique in the creative industry but striving to be unique really does validate our creativity" and [we] "would only hope you are true to your process." Basically challenging my creativity, my idea, my uniqueness, my process and my design/professional integrity....and it all came from someone I admired in the industry. Probably the worst words an artist can ever hear.

As someone who has struggled to make ends meet for many years because of the passion I have for all things done with a needle and thread, there are not words to tell you how heartbroken I was by these words. I have spent 20-years of my life building my brand with my own original designs. I deal with stealing of my ideas/designs and copyright infringement on a daily basis. Had I known any of the elements I was including in my quilt were being used by another creator, I would have steered far away from them, definitely not copied them. I know the artist the I am...and I know I have always been true to my process...and I know I put my heart and soul into every single project...but it still hurts...it hurts bad. I found myself trying to defend who I am as an artist and that is the lowest place to be...I found myself struggling.

When I received the message and removed my posts, I had not seen the quilt they designed....and after searching, I could only find a partial image of it (now a full image and pattern have been released). The two quilts have a couple of block element similarities, but (in my opinion) they are VERY different. While, their Amazing Grace quilt is truly lovely and a work of art, it is not really my style...so I am not sure why those specific words were sent to me. I am not trying to downplay Lori's feelings - she feels differently and I cannot change or control that. I have spent days over-thinking this situation and analyzing her words (yep, we all know that is me). I will continue to be cheerleader for Poppie Cotton and I definitely want them to succeed...but going forward, I'll just be doing it silently with a heavy heart.

I guess I am explaining all of this, because I need to lighten my load - clear the air - let this go and forget about it. I've let it rent a space in my mind for too long. I know a new opportunity will come along that will give my creativity wings - one where my uniqueness and creativity are appreciated and my joy can shine. I'll keep working on my own designs - cross stitch and quilting - and releasing them on my own terms for those who love and respect my work. This new speed bump is just pushing me down another path. My heart will mend and I'll find my true happy place again. For now, I find myself focusing on tasks and projects...reflecting and renewing my spirit.

Yes, new cross stitch designs are on the way - I apologize they are taking longer than planned - in fact, I am trying to get all the needlework finishing work I have done and off my plate, so I can focus on my own designs. That is my task right now - my mind numbing project - needlework finishing orders. There was a time when needlework finishing brought me so much joy - but I can honestly say after a conversation with a client last week, I don't know if  needlework finishing is something I will continue - if I do, it will be for a very limited number of clients...and those are clients who trust my abilities, let me be creative, give me minimal instruction and don't insult me (especially when they ask my advice and don't like the answer). I do have a very small handful of clients that I love working with and the projects they send are enjoyable (you know who you are)…but for the most part, I have learned that needlework finishing is a thankless job that takes loads of time and supplies and makes me pennies on the hour...and these projects are definitely not lucrative enough (creatively or financially) for me to be treated unkindly or disrespectfully. Another life lesson...I seem to be learning a lot of them lately.

To bring some happiness into this post - we had a lovely vacation at the end of April/beginning of May in the Smokey Mountains. Our secluded cabin was incredible and we took advantage of the the outdoor fireplace, hot tub, game room and jacuzzi. We did a lot of outdoor sightseeing, just breathing in the fresh mountain air. We relaxed and refreshed our spirits. We did take in a few of the local sights and a couple touristy things - but for the most past, we used the time to slow down, unplug and be outdoors. I did take some great photos and may or may not do a long-overdue blog post sharing them.

The photos in this post are of my front yard flower garden and the flower pots on my porch. My dear friend Kimber gave me a gift certificate for Baker Creek Heirloom Seeds for my birthday and I decided to try planting seeds in all my pots this year - something I have never done before. I guess my momma's green thumb and advice has nurtured me, because all my seeds sprouted and are blooming and growing...and it has truly been a highlight for me the last few weeks. My mom gets daily texts from me with photos sharing my excitement...and I have shared a few photos on my Instagram story. We also completed a big landscaping project in our backyard last weekend. Another note of happy - we finally purchased some patio furniture, installed a fabulous privacy screen on our patio...and installed a storm door, so the dogs can enjoy a view of the front yard (but mostly because it keeps them contained when the doorbell rings)…

I have a million and one creative photos to share (well, maybe not a million, but there are over 11,000 images on my iPhone right now - true story)...so I'll make time to share some of my finishes with you...and maybe when I feel a bit more myself, I will post a new FlossTube video...some wounds of the heart just take a little longer to heal. Rest assured, things are buzzing along in my studio...and I be back to share more happy, creative posts soon!